I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
