My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
