Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize