am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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