Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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