Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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