Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
