Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize