Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
