Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
