If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
