Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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