If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i want to swaddle you in tequila
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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