in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
