Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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