i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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