I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize