Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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