Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
wow bdsm is so cute
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize