She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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