and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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