Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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