just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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