Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
