took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
