Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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