love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
