The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
