I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize
