no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
worst night to have a conscience
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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