I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
