I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
