i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
