ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
