I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
