Screwed.edu
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I think your dad took our porno
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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