His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize