Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
