Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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