i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize