I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
