I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
The uberlube is also flammable
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
