lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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