Do vagina's smell?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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