ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
