i think my tv is drunk
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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