I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
