Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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