wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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