How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
