coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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